Tuesday 31 August 2010
Monday 30 August 2010
formspring
formspring.me/kittypurryyy
i disabled my account for a while there simply because i got tired of arguing with anonymous people over my own fucking life and what i can and can't do or what i should or shouldn't do. Normally I'm happy enough arguing with twats, but its the fact it was a blog reader who gurned at me because i wrote which contraceptive method i used, and actually called me immature when they were sitting going 'you kill babies LULZ' loveeeely.
well anyway, i'm just not going to accept anymore mean questions, i just cant be assed to be completely honest. ask me something interesting and it will get posted. I barely check it anymore anyway but it would be nice :)
i disabled my account for a while there simply because i got tired of arguing with anonymous people over my own fucking life and what i can and can't do or what i should or shouldn't do. Normally I'm happy enough arguing with twats, but its the fact it was a blog reader who gurned at me because i wrote which contraceptive method i used, and actually called me immature when they were sitting going 'you kill babies LULZ' loveeeely.
well anyway, i'm just not going to accept anymore mean questions, i just cant be assed to be completely honest. ask me something interesting and it will get posted. I barely check it anymore anyway but it would be nice :)
week
LOL.
Ryan Mckeating you complete me, if only i were straight
my friend wrote that on a picture of me on facebook. I LOVE HIM. HOW SWEET WAS THAT?! <3
lack of blogging.
scratch all the negativity. everything is okay. i get too pissed off easily sometimes, well more i take offense too easily SOMETIMES. not gonna lie but the past week has been mentaaal, starting with an acid trip and ending with DAVID GUETTA. I have either been tripping or steamin' all week long and have to say I loved it. Despite the fact i went from being immensely happy to immensely sad, glad tho i had afew cries, i feel alot better. One drawback is I didnt get into my course in tech and need to change courses, thats the only thing I'm panicy about, if i get into a course or not. I really really want to be doing something this year. I will cry if I have to sit and do nothing or just have a job or something.
my love life is a tad complicated, i gave up on it but then i decided just to be more laid back about it and not get as melted if I don't get my own way all the time. I'm single tho so its all good anyways. not too bothered there.
Soulwax, 2manydj's and Major Lazer, Fake blood and David Guetta were all AMAZING.
thats all i can be bothered writing for now. I'm slightly hungover and very bruised.
my love life is a tad complicated, i gave up on it but then i decided just to be more laid back about it and not get as melted if I don't get my own way all the time. I'm single tho so its all good anyways. not too bothered there.
Soulwax, 2manydj's and Major Lazer, Fake blood and David Guetta were all AMAZING.
thats all i can be bothered writing for now. I'm slightly hungover and very bruised.
Tuesday 24 August 2010
happyhappy
im overall pretty happy. im keeping myself busy, im getting tech sorted out, gonna look for a job soon, have concerts this week, seeing my friends more and more, getting a hamster and today im going to take acid for the first time.
i was surrounded by alot of people on acid yesterday and ive ALWAYS wanted to take it. todays my day. i found all these sites ages ago which had like full stories of peoples experiences on it from their point of view. It all sounds so spiritual and amazing and apparently music is mental on it. I'm pretty excited for it :)
im pretty excited though about which way my life is going. I cba dealing with my love life anymore, I seem to try more than him, its apparent. I can honestly say i stopped caring after i said 'im not waiting anymore', and this time for once...i decided for myself, not like i got fucked to the side or anything. feeling pretty happy about that aswell. my minds been taken off it anyway because of how busy ive been.
also, i changed my formspring so that anonymous people can't send me anything. I got abused by a 'blog reader' because I posted about contraception and my choice of contraception. It went further into a debate until they decided to say 'little girl' and slag me for my apparent 'indie kid from skins' attitude..oh right? lmao, and then that went even further until they said i liked to kill babies.
i realised..why am i wasting my time with anonymous people who show me absolute no respect for no reason after ive been through alot of shit. I realised i deserve none of it. so im cutting myself off from everything potentially negative. guess thats why i gave up on my love life for the first time :)
wish me luck i guess.
i was surrounded by alot of people on acid yesterday and ive ALWAYS wanted to take it. todays my day. i found all these sites ages ago which had like full stories of peoples experiences on it from their point of view. It all sounds so spiritual and amazing and apparently music is mental on it. I'm pretty excited for it :)
im pretty excited though about which way my life is going. I cba dealing with my love life anymore, I seem to try more than him, its apparent. I can honestly say i stopped caring after i said 'im not waiting anymore', and this time for once...i decided for myself, not like i got fucked to the side or anything. feeling pretty happy about that aswell. my minds been taken off it anyway because of how busy ive been.
also, i changed my formspring so that anonymous people can't send me anything. I got abused by a 'blog reader' because I posted about contraception and my choice of contraception. It went further into a debate until they decided to say 'little girl' and slag me for my apparent 'indie kid from skins' attitude..oh right? lmao, and then that went even further until they said i liked to kill babies.
i realised..why am i wasting my time with anonymous people who show me absolute no respect for no reason after ive been through alot of shit. I realised i deserve none of it. so im cutting myself off from everything potentially negative. guess thats why i gave up on my love life for the first time :)
wish me luck i guess.
Sunday 22 August 2010
im not angry
decided im not angry. just going to not wait around, doing what i wanna do now. focusing more. ive forgiven and gotten over everything properly now. now their wont be anything more that can effect me, im done :)
giving up
yea thats what im going to do. maybe not giving up in a sense but moving on. my lifes been too messy for too long. I dont like being treated badly. I myself know i deserve better than that.
im just tired
ive just realised, not alot of people are ever that nice to me. alot of people question, belittle, blame and be plain cheeky/rude to...over nothing. hmm
dunno who reads this.
Havn't sent this blog to alot of people. I said on this I use this to write whatever the fuck i want and it started off private as private, for myself (it still is for myself). I posted my formspring on this so anyone could ask me questions and someone actually left 'was there a need for you to post what kind of contraceptive you use, and when you took it on your blog'
yea, because for a start this is my blog and contraception kind of relates to the most personal intense shit ive wrote about on this. So if i wanna talk about it, I'm going to. This blog is not for ANYONE but myself and if your going to leave me stupid shit like that, make your own blog and gurn about it there.
i cant believe i wrote that because right now im high as fuck and want chocolate cake so so bad.
going to go watch I <3 huckabee's while im still like this because i know its going to confuse the absolute fuck out of me.
im actually laughing at what i wrote up there after i read it over, lmao, oh no i told internet blog readers im on the pill and i took it. sorry lmao next time ill say i just took a headache tablet so you don't get TOO disgusted :)
yea, because for a start this is my blog and contraception kind of relates to the most personal intense shit ive wrote about on this. So if i wanna talk about it, I'm going to. This blog is not for ANYONE but myself and if your going to leave me stupid shit like that, make your own blog and gurn about it there.
i cant believe i wrote that because right now im high as fuck and want chocolate cake so so bad.
going to go watch I <3 huckabee's while im still like this because i know its going to confuse the absolute fuck out of me.
im actually laughing at what i wrote up there after i read it over, lmao, oh no i told internet blog readers im on the pill and i took it. sorry lmao next time ill say i just took a headache tablet so you don't get TOO disgusted :)
Wednesday 18 August 2010
little known facts about me
I'm bored and felt a blog like this coming on.
I have exactly 7 my little ponies. 5 of which have names 'Princess Sidekick' 'Dizzle' 'Captain Daryl' 'Spike' and 'Glitters'
Most of my usernames for facebook, twitter, formspring etc. are called kittypurryyy, kitty purry is the name of katy perry's cat :)
I love animals so much. Right now i'd love a hamster, rabbit or a puppy again.
I had a dog named Charlie, he got ran over when he was 2 :(
If i were to get a bunny, id call it pancakes which is what Summer from the OC called her bunny in the show.
I have 2 cats, one called Acid, one called Tabs ;)
I am obsessed with pink hair, Audrey Kitching made that obsession undeniably worse. I feel happiest when my hair is pink :)
I dye my hair depending on my moods I think. I dye my hair an awful lot.
I do not have one favourite film, these are my favourites 'True Romance' 'The Fifth Element' 'Donnie Darko' 'Hellboy' and 'Factory Girl'
I was/am obsessed with Leeloo from the fifth element. Because of that I have a following obsession with Mila Jovovich who is well known for playing Alice in the Resident Evil movies.
I also love LOVE Resident Evil. I have the 'Extinction' Poster in my room.
I have alot of posters including a massive Sex Pistols Canvas, along with that there is Green Day, Harry Potter, Resident Evil, Sid Vicious, Pulp Fiction, Red hot chilli peppers, Wolverine, Lady Gaga and MEGAN FOX.
I am in love with all things Quentin Tarantino, He wrote True Romance so in a way I'd say thats my favourite movie of his.
The 2 people I am incredibly in love with is Robert Downey Jr. and MEGAN FOX. Jennifers body<3
I also really love love love Leornardo Dicaprio.
I really like Alice in wonderland, dosn't everyone these days though..
I've seen beyonce, pink, CSS, Gwen Stefani, Mindless Self Indulgence, My Chemical Romance, Hadouken!, two door cinema club, 2 Many Dj's, Boyz Noize and Deadmau5 live <3
My Favourite band is the pixies.
closely followed by System of a down.
I have an intense love for Motley Crue.
I am VERY into grunge music. I love abit of everything, particularly beats haha but I can;t get enough of music like the pixies, nirvana, sonic youth etc.
I love Edie Sedgewick and Sid Vicious. They are my ultimate Idols.
I LOVE Katy perry. Contrary to popular belief I do not think I am/look like her and nor am I TRYING to be her. I just like using the name kitty purry (which is her cat..ive said this) I think it's cute. Also, I get told I look like her WHEN I have black hair. Not my problem.
I swear abit too much.
I have been in a 2 year relationship.
I've only ever been in love once, despite thinking I was in love once, I realised I never was until I properly fell in love. The person I thought I loved when i was 14 LOL I have no feelings for whatsoever now. funny thaaat.
I love skins, most teenagers do. However, I prefer Misfits.
Robert Sheehan who plays Nathan MAKES the show, though I do love the other characters.
I have worked on a movie WITH Robert Sheehan. It's called Killing Bono. I was in a gig scene and he was right infront of me O.o
I want to be either an actress, model, photographer or writer.
My Favourite colours are lilac, blue and pink. ALSO certain greens. I'd say lilac wins overall.
I have a lilac Blackberry :)
I have too many clothes, I'm not even saying that to sound cool or anything but I honestly do, I need to throw half of them out. My mothers too good to me.
I've been bullied 3 times in my life.
Theirs only ONE person i truly hate, I wouldnt even say hate, properly TRULY dislike.
I'm a smoker.
I used to do mephedrone, crystal meth, herbal coke..etc. for around 5/6 months. Aswell as e's, weed and dope. During that time I didn't really drink that much.
I've near died while drinking, I've been sick off drink plenty of times, but one time I drank a whole massive bottle of vodka and passed out and was still thoriwng up and retching and I can't remember any of it.
I was sniffing meph 2 days before I found out I was pregnant.
I think women should have a choice for abortions and not just keep it for the sake of keeping a child. Pregnancy is a hard thing to go through, you need to think about YOUR life and It's.
I do want to have kids when I'm older.
I used to love to drink Absinthe. It is the strongest drink I have ever had.
I first time I played the game of kings, I threw up everywhere.
I lost my virginity when i was 15. I'm not too worried if that was too much information for you haha.
I like sex.
I am on the pill now. I advise alot of girls to atleast be on something. DO NOT RELY ON CONDOMS OR THE PULL OUT METHOD ALONE.
I have an incredibly short temper these days. However I am a rather optimistic laid back person who tries not to care about the small stuff.
Most of my BEST friends are boys. I have 2 amazing girl BEST friends.
I am 18 in 5 months. January 26th to be exact.
I love comic books, Hellboy is my favourite.
I havebeen watching Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Angel since I was 6. I have every episode of both shows on tape and know basically everything about both shows.
I currently have Pink hair.
I fucking LOVE disneyland so fucking much. I have been 3 times and my fucking god, I need to go back. IT'S SO MAGICAL.
I wish i could speak french. I know very little of it :(
I love blogging.
I love staying in other boys houses, whereas I prefer girls to stay at mine. I don't know why that is.
I fucking hate the hype over things like Twilight, Justin Beiber, High school musical and Miley Cyrus.
I HATE TWILIGHT SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA. i could list of the bad points all fucking day about the books and the movies. THEY HAVE RUINED VAMPIRES. I know this as I watched Buffy all my life and watched movies like blade, lost boys, interview with a vampire...FUCKERS. i get so angry thinking about Twilight.
I am OBSESSED with Harry Potter. SHOCKINGLY i was obsessed with Robert Pattinson when he played Cedric Diggory. HE'S RUINED HIMSELF. HIM AND HIS SHIT ACTING.
anyway yes, Harry Potter is a godsent. I've read all the books atleast 3 or 4 times each. maybe more.
My favourite characters are Luna Lovegood, Draco Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange <3
I used to be called Emo/goth all the fucking time cuz I'm naturally pale with naturally dark hair. rock on.
I daydream alot. My attention span can be very short sadly.
I love reading books. I don't think I read enough.
I don't really regret anything in my life because then I wouldn't be where I am now. I've done stupid things and made mistakes yes but i wouldn't take them back or I never would have learned anything.
I'm straight. I have gay friends who are both boys and girls. I love them
Im not against gay people atall.
I've kissed girls, Im not bisexual though.
Id fancy celebrity girls though such as MEGAN FOX mmmm
I love compliments and flattery. Some people hate it, I love it. Guess it due to the fact I've been bullied many times.
I used to never be able to talk to boys or people really in general and be really shy. Im the complete opposite now. Im incredibly forward and confident. I prefer it this way if im honest.
I am a complete movie geek.
I LOVE THE RAIN. ITS RAINING NOW.
I love fashion so much.
I hate people who think there better than other people and are incredibly arrogant.
I am attracted to funny weird guys. aswell as guys who can be abit bad, are ballsy and quite confident. Oh and talk loads and can be sweet at times. Guys who can argue back with me.
I'm not attracted to shy awkward guys and guys who can't talk or arn't funny.
I don't really go for looks alone atall.
I have dated alot of skateboarders.
I generally hate girls and give off a bad vibe to them. They all annoy me unless i talk to them and i like them. If they run past me and are all giggly and generally melt me...i will probably have a face on me -.-
My favourite food is spaghetti bolognese.
I have an amazing memory. I can remember every single lyric to every song on my ipod. I can also remember so many memories that most people can't. I remember the names to alot ALOT of actors and actresses and I can remember stories really well and the names of all the buffy episodes.
Its probably why I done really good in History, I got a B in my GCSE for History.
I am absolutely dreadful at maths. I don't even try atall.
I love Video Games. I love LOVE LOVEEE The Legend of Zelda. Link is so bitchin'.
I've completed Resistance with my friend last summer, I'm also really good at Call Of Duty once I get the hang of the controller haha. I really love war games.
I'm such a guy sometimes
I am 17.
I am an aquarius
I am clean of drugs atm.
I need a smoke.
I have exactly 7 my little ponies. 5 of which have names 'Princess Sidekick' 'Dizzle' 'Captain Daryl' 'Spike' and 'Glitters'
Most of my usernames for facebook, twitter, formspring etc. are called kittypurryyy, kitty purry is the name of katy perry's cat :)
I love animals so much. Right now i'd love a hamster, rabbit or a puppy again.
I had a dog named Charlie, he got ran over when he was 2 :(
If i were to get a bunny, id call it pancakes which is what Summer from the OC called her bunny in the show.
I have 2 cats, one called Acid, one called Tabs ;)
I am obsessed with pink hair, Audrey Kitching made that obsession undeniably worse. I feel happiest when my hair is pink :)
I dye my hair depending on my moods I think. I dye my hair an awful lot.
I do not have one favourite film, these are my favourites 'True Romance' 'The Fifth Element' 'Donnie Darko' 'Hellboy' and 'Factory Girl'
I was/am obsessed with Leeloo from the fifth element. Because of that I have a following obsession with Mila Jovovich who is well known for playing Alice in the Resident Evil movies.
I also love LOVE Resident Evil. I have the 'Extinction' Poster in my room.
I have alot of posters including a massive Sex Pistols Canvas, along with that there is Green Day, Harry Potter, Resident Evil, Sid Vicious, Pulp Fiction, Red hot chilli peppers, Wolverine, Lady Gaga and MEGAN FOX.
I am in love with all things Quentin Tarantino, He wrote True Romance so in a way I'd say thats my favourite movie of his.
The 2 people I am incredibly in love with is Robert Downey Jr. and MEGAN FOX. Jennifers body<3
I also really love love love Leornardo Dicaprio.
I really like Alice in wonderland, dosn't everyone these days though..
I've seen beyonce, pink, CSS, Gwen Stefani, Mindless Self Indulgence, My Chemical Romance, Hadouken!, two door cinema club, 2 Many Dj's, Boyz Noize and Deadmau5 live <3
My Favourite band is the pixies.
closely followed by System of a down.
I have an intense love for Motley Crue.
I am VERY into grunge music. I love abit of everything, particularly beats haha but I can;t get enough of music like the pixies, nirvana, sonic youth etc.
I love Edie Sedgewick and Sid Vicious. They are my ultimate Idols.
I LOVE Katy perry. Contrary to popular belief I do not think I am/look like her and nor am I TRYING to be her. I just like using the name kitty purry (which is her cat..ive said this) I think it's cute. Also, I get told I look like her WHEN I have black hair. Not my problem.
I swear abit too much.
I have been in a 2 year relationship.
I've only ever been in love once, despite thinking I was in love once, I realised I never was until I properly fell in love. The person I thought I loved when i was 14 LOL I have no feelings for whatsoever now. funny thaaat.
I love skins, most teenagers do. However, I prefer Misfits.
Robert Sheehan who plays Nathan MAKES the show, though I do love the other characters.
I have worked on a movie WITH Robert Sheehan. It's called Killing Bono. I was in a gig scene and he was right infront of me O.o
I want to be either an actress, model, photographer or writer.
My Favourite colours are lilac, blue and pink. ALSO certain greens. I'd say lilac wins overall.
I have a lilac Blackberry :)
I have too many clothes, I'm not even saying that to sound cool or anything but I honestly do, I need to throw half of them out. My mothers too good to me.
I've been bullied 3 times in my life.
Theirs only ONE person i truly hate, I wouldnt even say hate, properly TRULY dislike.
I'm a smoker.
I used to do mephedrone, crystal meth, herbal coke..etc. for around 5/6 months. Aswell as e's, weed and dope. During that time I didn't really drink that much.
I've near died while drinking, I've been sick off drink plenty of times, but one time I drank a whole massive bottle of vodka and passed out and was still thoriwng up and retching and I can't remember any of it.
I was sniffing meph 2 days before I found out I was pregnant.
I think women should have a choice for abortions and not just keep it for the sake of keeping a child. Pregnancy is a hard thing to go through, you need to think about YOUR life and It's.
I do want to have kids when I'm older.
I used to love to drink Absinthe. It is the strongest drink I have ever had.
I first time I played the game of kings, I threw up everywhere.
I lost my virginity when i was 15. I'm not too worried if that was too much information for you haha.
I like sex.
I am on the pill now. I advise alot of girls to atleast be on something. DO NOT RELY ON CONDOMS OR THE PULL OUT METHOD ALONE.
I have an incredibly short temper these days. However I am a rather optimistic laid back person who tries not to care about the small stuff.
Most of my BEST friends are boys. I have 2 amazing girl BEST friends.
I am 18 in 5 months. January 26th to be exact.
I love comic books, Hellboy is my favourite.
I havebeen watching Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Angel since I was 6. I have every episode of both shows on tape and know basically everything about both shows.
I currently have Pink hair.
I fucking LOVE disneyland so fucking much. I have been 3 times and my fucking god, I need to go back. IT'S SO MAGICAL.
I wish i could speak french. I know very little of it :(
I love blogging.
I love staying in other boys houses, whereas I prefer girls to stay at mine. I don't know why that is.
I fucking hate the hype over things like Twilight, Justin Beiber, High school musical and Miley Cyrus.
I HATE TWILIGHT SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA. i could list of the bad points all fucking day about the books and the movies. THEY HAVE RUINED VAMPIRES. I know this as I watched Buffy all my life and watched movies like blade, lost boys, interview with a vampire...FUCKERS. i get so angry thinking about Twilight.
I am OBSESSED with Harry Potter. SHOCKINGLY i was obsessed with Robert Pattinson when he played Cedric Diggory. HE'S RUINED HIMSELF. HIM AND HIS SHIT ACTING.
anyway yes, Harry Potter is a godsent. I've read all the books atleast 3 or 4 times each. maybe more.
My favourite characters are Luna Lovegood, Draco Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange <3
I used to be called Emo/goth all the fucking time cuz I'm naturally pale with naturally dark hair. rock on.
I daydream alot. My attention span can be very short sadly.
I love reading books. I don't think I read enough.
I don't really regret anything in my life because then I wouldn't be where I am now. I've done stupid things and made mistakes yes but i wouldn't take them back or I never would have learned anything.
I'm straight. I have gay friends who are both boys and girls. I love them
Im not against gay people atall.
I've kissed girls, Im not bisexual though.
Id fancy celebrity girls though such as MEGAN FOX mmmm
I love compliments and flattery. Some people hate it, I love it. Guess it due to the fact I've been bullied many times.
I used to never be able to talk to boys or people really in general and be really shy. Im the complete opposite now. Im incredibly forward and confident. I prefer it this way if im honest.
I am a complete movie geek.
I LOVE THE RAIN. ITS RAINING NOW.
I love fashion so much.
I hate people who think there better than other people and are incredibly arrogant.
I am attracted to funny weird guys. aswell as guys who can be abit bad, are ballsy and quite confident. Oh and talk loads and can be sweet at times. Guys who can argue back with me.
I'm not attracted to shy awkward guys and guys who can't talk or arn't funny.
I don't really go for looks alone atall.
I have dated alot of skateboarders.
I generally hate girls and give off a bad vibe to them. They all annoy me unless i talk to them and i like them. If they run past me and are all giggly and generally melt me...i will probably have a face on me -.-
My favourite food is spaghetti bolognese.
I have an amazing memory. I can remember every single lyric to every song on my ipod. I can also remember so many memories that most people can't. I remember the names to alot ALOT of actors and actresses and I can remember stories really well and the names of all the buffy episodes.
Its probably why I done really good in History, I got a B in my GCSE for History.
I am absolutely dreadful at maths. I don't even try atall.
I love Video Games. I love LOVE LOVEEE The Legend of Zelda. Link is so bitchin'.
I've completed Resistance with my friend last summer, I'm also really good at Call Of Duty once I get the hang of the controller haha. I really love war games.
I'm such a guy sometimes
I am 17.
I am an aquarius
I am clean of drugs atm.
I need a smoke.
Tuesday 17 August 2010
Monday 16 August 2010
pink stains
im always hungry. im guessing its this contraceptive pill. i wont be on it for too much longer, gonna get the jab.
im absolutely terrified that i don't get my period and i end up pregnant again this year.
i've been searching loads of websites on the pill and they all make me feel better. they said its more likely to get pregnant using just condoms than it is using just the pill. there almost 100% you wont get pregnant on the pill if you dont miss a day. I havnt missed a day. I dont ever want to miss a day.
i dont think its possible to get pregnant while being on the pill and using condoms. And it seems pretty fucking unlikely you'd get pregnant just using the pill itself.
I just don't want to be pregnant. I'm paranoid. slightly, only slightly
im absolutely terrified that i don't get my period and i end up pregnant again this year.
i've been searching loads of websites on the pill and they all make me feel better. they said its more likely to get pregnant using just condoms than it is using just the pill. there almost 100% you wont get pregnant on the pill if you dont miss a day. I havnt missed a day. I dont ever want to miss a day.
i dont think its possible to get pregnant while being on the pill and using condoms. And it seems pretty fucking unlikely you'd get pregnant just using the pill itself.
I just don't want to be pregnant. I'm paranoid. slightly, only slightly
itchin'
I wish i wasn't so god damn addicted to hair dye. my hairs like a my little ponyyyy. actually fuck that i love hair dye. its so magical. however, i am itching slightly.
Everything seems to be going good. Fuck that word seems, everything IS going good. I'm staying positive, well more just staying mellow and not stressing over TOO stupid of things. My tempers awful though, i fly off the handle at everything these days and i seem to be developing more and more irratible pet hates. I think I'll manage though. Everything is coming together nicely, im surprised. Very surprised. Yenoe what that means though, everythings gonna go shitttt!
ach well im learning not to care too much. its just life. its how it goeees. how it rollssss
Everything seems to be going good. Fuck that word seems, everything IS going good. I'm staying positive, well more just staying mellow and not stressing over TOO stupid of things. My tempers awful though, i fly off the handle at everything these days and i seem to be developing more and more irratible pet hates. I think I'll manage though. Everything is coming together nicely, im surprised. Very surprised. Yenoe what that means though, everythings gonna go shitttt!
ach well im learning not to care too much. its just life. its how it goeees. how it rollssss
cant stop taking fucking pics.
i really can't help it. im so obsessed with this pink hair...like seriously..its just..so beautiful to me.
3rd time lucky
goodbye red, hello pink.
this is the 3rd time dying it pink. lucky, eyyy ;) well anyway yea its turned out pretty shite AHA. its a lovely colour but i ran out of dye and loads of patches are orangey yellow and a few random black roots which will be gettin' bleached soon! Holly's cut my fringe though and fuck me, FUCK ME, it is good. too good. I havn't had my fringe cut since...January. Holy fuck, it needed it. I'm gonna put white underneath my fringe, hopefully it turns out goooood.
anyway heres a pic of what its like so far.
this is the 3rd time dying it pink. lucky, eyyy ;) well anyway yea its turned out pretty shite AHA. its a lovely colour but i ran out of dye and loads of patches are orangey yellow and a few random black roots which will be gettin' bleached soon! Holly's cut my fringe though and fuck me, FUCK ME, it is good. too good. I havn't had my fringe cut since...January. Holy fuck, it needed it. I'm gonna put white underneath my fringe, hopefully it turns out goooood.
anyway heres a pic of what its like so far.
Sunday 15 August 2010
addicted
you have no idea how good these games are..
http://games.adultswim.com/robot-unicorn-attack-twitchy-online-game.html
theres unicorn attack ^^^ you are guarantee'd to laugh at the song they play in the background. It's so like...80's or somethin' :)
http://games.adultswim.com/robot-unicorn-attack-twitchy-online-game.html
theres unicorn attack ^^^ you are guarantee'd to laugh at the song they play in the background. It's so like...80's or somethin' :)
Since decent people read this..
www.formspring.me/kittypurryyy
i usually get people trying to annoy me. like the latest one for example which i know is complete balls. why do people waste there time...
i usually get people trying to annoy me. like the latest one for example which i know is complete balls. why do people waste there time...
Friday 13 August 2010
Argumentitive AS fuck.
Wednesday was really niceee. I'm not one for listing off every exact detail of what i did or who was there but I'll tell you bout Wednesday and Thursday.
Had a really nice day with Gemma chillin' about town until Nina's party in Chiquito's in Victoria Square. Me and Gemma were the first ones there at 7 so we just sat and smoked and shit ourselves because we were skint and the food was all mexican. BUT we actually got really nice foooood. mm. OH Molly was there :) She came back from New York, she wasn't happy with me though and my love situation, but she loves me so she couldn't stay mad at me for too long.
After I was at Alans and alot alot of people were there. But I was busy arguing on the phone with Chris (most stupid argument ever), trying to charge my phone at the same time, mixing up alot of drinks in a bottle from the drinks cupboard and tryna scrounge change and cigarettes. It was pretty hectic trying to do all this at once but I managed. I didn't even drink the drink i mixed up. JD, Wkd and baileys i think? not nice anyway mate.
ANYWAY i eventually stopped arguing and got a fucking taxi. I had such an angry face on me when i was in his house though. But everything was sweet in the end and I ended up having a nice night anyway despite the fact that we manage to be so sweet and lovely and cute then next second we are the most angry people ever. We are both way too argumentative for our own good. Those arguements always end up with really retarded 'sorrys' or alot of laughter. DAMNITT
I don't know what I'm doing today. blah blaaah bored
Had a really nice day with Gemma chillin' about town until Nina's party in Chiquito's in Victoria Square. Me and Gemma were the first ones there at 7 so we just sat and smoked and shit ourselves because we were skint and the food was all mexican. BUT we actually got really nice foooood. mm. OH Molly was there :) She came back from New York, she wasn't happy with me though and my love situation, but she loves me so she couldn't stay mad at me for too long.
After I was at Alans and alot alot of people were there. But I was busy arguing on the phone with Chris (most stupid argument ever), trying to charge my phone at the same time, mixing up alot of drinks in a bottle from the drinks cupboard and tryna scrounge change and cigarettes. It was pretty hectic trying to do all this at once but I managed. I didn't even drink the drink i mixed up. JD, Wkd and baileys i think? not nice anyway mate.
ANYWAY i eventually stopped arguing and got a fucking taxi. I had such an angry face on me when i was in his house though. But everything was sweet in the end and I ended up having a nice night anyway despite the fact that we manage to be so sweet and lovely and cute then next second we are the most angry people ever. We are both way too argumentative for our own good. Those arguements always end up with really retarded 'sorrys' or alot of laughter. DAMNITT
I don't know what I'm doing today. blah blaaah bored
Wednesday 11 August 2010
If I told you things i've did before.
I can't stop singing 'young folks', its properly stuck in my head, and it's the easiest song to ever sing.
I really love certain peoples blogs, they are so interesting and deep and tell me alot about them in a non-up themselves fashion. Some blogs though, really fuck me off. I guess their not the kinda shit I want to hear. Not my style. Something like that...not that I'm going to name drop who's I love or who's I hate...doubt you'd even know them, or maybe I'm just lying incase YOU, whoever you are reading, gets paranoid because you have a blog. Why would you care anyway though? exactly.
My brother's so lucky. He's 5. He dosn't have to do anything except be a complete asshole of a child at times and get away with it. He gets to look forward to things like Santa and playing in school playgrounds and being slightly scared of Halloween...and actually wanting to spend time with my mum and dad on long road trips. NOT that i would go back to being a child. My lifes been overall pretty sweet.
Incase your one of them seriously nosy people who want to know every exact detail of my day or what I'm doing, I'VE ONLY WOKE UP AND AM LYING IN BED. Though I can tell you about my day ahead..not that I'm psychic or anything. Well exactly 2 secs ago I took the pill (not the morning after pill you divs, the contraceptive pill) I love dry swallowing them, mm. In about exactly an hour I will be washed, cleaned, groomed, dressed and sparkling to go see Gem in town. Hopefully Beth is coming in and we can shop about and stuff like that until the time comes to go to Victoria Square, Chiquito's to be exact, for Nina's brithday dinner. Theeeen I'm going back to Ballyclare to find Chris and also buy Ryan cigarettes as he's gurning at me too, and so far I treat him like a brother..at times. So maybe I should refuse buying him cigarettes. NAOO, i'll be cool.
That's really all I have to say at the minute.
I really love certain peoples blogs, they are so interesting and deep and tell me alot about them in a non-up themselves fashion. Some blogs though, really fuck me off. I guess their not the kinda shit I want to hear. Not my style. Something like that...not that I'm going to name drop who's I love or who's I hate...doubt you'd even know them, or maybe I'm just lying incase YOU, whoever you are reading, gets paranoid because you have a blog. Why would you care anyway though? exactly.
My brother's so lucky. He's 5. He dosn't have to do anything except be a complete asshole of a child at times and get away with it. He gets to look forward to things like Santa and playing in school playgrounds and being slightly scared of Halloween...and actually wanting to spend time with my mum and dad on long road trips. NOT that i would go back to being a child. My lifes been overall pretty sweet.
Incase your one of them seriously nosy people who want to know every exact detail of my day or what I'm doing, I'VE ONLY WOKE UP AND AM LYING IN BED. Though I can tell you about my day ahead..not that I'm psychic or anything. Well exactly 2 secs ago I took the pill (not the morning after pill you divs, the contraceptive pill) I love dry swallowing them, mm. In about exactly an hour I will be washed, cleaned, groomed, dressed and sparkling to go see Gem in town. Hopefully Beth is coming in and we can shop about and stuff like that until the time comes to go to Victoria Square, Chiquito's to be exact, for Nina's brithday dinner. Theeeen I'm going back to Ballyclare to find Chris and also buy Ryan cigarettes as he's gurning at me too, and so far I treat him like a brother..at times. So maybe I should refuse buying him cigarettes. NAOO, i'll be cool.
That's really all I have to say at the minute.
Tuesday 10 August 2010
Hits from the bong.
'I smoke a fat pound of grass, and fall down on my ass faster than the fat bitch who sat down too fast'
I had an urge to blog about GANJAAAAA. ooo the marijuanaaaa. Maybe it's because i've been drawing bongs out of nowhere or listening to afroman or the fact I know I'm going to get high off my face tomorrow. DO NOT mistake this as a blog bragging about drugs or some shit. Most of the time I'm offered weed/dope I always say no. I can never be assed. Honestly, it pisses me off getting high half the time because then you do nothing and things start going weird and slow and you feel pinned to the ground..
really what I'm saying is...yenoe those moods you get into..where you just want to get rediculously high and laugh at everything? Just like when people are all 'LETS GET DRUNK THIS WEEKEND LEDSSS' aye that, cept you get munchies and not a shitty ass hangover.
Anyway, last week when i was i'd say..ABIT stoned from smoking half a spliff and 3 baby buckets, i rolled up onto a ball on chris's floor and tried to stand on my head. I didn't really think I was high until after...I don't know why i had the urge to do that.
hmm, someones making a blog right nowww, and that someone could be yooou ;) in all serious though, i know someone making a blog right now.
I had an urge to blog about GANJAAAAA. ooo the marijuanaaaa. Maybe it's because i've been drawing bongs out of nowhere or listening to afroman or the fact I know I'm going to get high off my face tomorrow. DO NOT mistake this as a blog bragging about drugs or some shit. Most of the time I'm offered weed/dope I always say no. I can never be assed. Honestly, it pisses me off getting high half the time because then you do nothing and things start going weird and slow and you feel pinned to the ground..
really what I'm saying is...yenoe those moods you get into..where you just want to get rediculously high and laugh at everything? Just like when people are all 'LETS GET DRUNK THIS WEEKEND LEDSSS' aye that, cept you get munchies and not a shitty ass hangover.
Anyway, last week when i was i'd say..ABIT stoned from smoking half a spliff and 3 baby buckets, i rolled up onto a ball on chris's floor and tried to stand on my head. I didn't really think I was high until after...I don't know why i had the urge to do that.
hmm, someones making a blog right nowww, and that someone could be yooou ;) in all serious though, i know someone making a blog right now.
oh dear.
I started this blog like..just for myself. And more and more people seem to be reading it...so yea, towards the start of it, if you ever get there, if you can be assed. Theirs alot of intense shit on abortions and stuff like that, I've decided I'm not keeping that private so If you can't deal with it then fuck off. I don't like being judged about that sort of shit.
On a lighter note I am surrounded by my camera, pencil, sketchbooks, cigarettes, lighter, cough medicine, shoes, gloves, headbands, dresses, pillowss...all engulfing me on my bed.
I NEED TO TIDY UP.
On a lighter note I am surrounded by my camera, pencil, sketchbooks, cigarettes, lighter, cough medicine, shoes, gloves, headbands, dresses, pillowss...all engulfing me on my bed.
I NEED TO TIDY UP.
Gemma Clarke
I'm pretty happy with how this turned out of Gemma :) I forgot to add in a penguin though :( LOL
EXCITED ABOUT DRAWING.
I showed my mum that pic of Chris i drew down there and she loved it. I was all 'I had to add in a stupid fucking bong...' and she didn't even say anything she was just like 'The bong looks good aswell' LOL ROCK ON MUM.
I've decided im going to draw more pictures of some of my friends and ones of me and my friends together, stuff like that. And if they want them I may give them to them. Shannieee, I know your probably going to be reading this at some point, and I think ill draw a pic of you as you share my love of art and it might brighten up your day :)
MUCH LOVEEEEEEE <3
I've decided im going to draw more pictures of some of my friends and ones of me and my friends together, stuff like that. And if they want them I may give them to them. Shannieee, I know your probably going to be reading this at some point, and I think ill draw a pic of you as you share my love of art and it might brighten up your day :)
MUCH LOVEEEEEEE <3
Stress balls
I NEED ONE.
i severe stress myself out over fuck all. I hate people who are so unorganised and I organise fuckin everrrrything with everyone, callin' them and all that shit. ITS STRESSFUL WORK. Especially when your on the phone to someone and your like 'Awk so do you wanna do somethin' this week hmm hmm?' and there all 'IM SKATING ALL THE TIME BUT YEA SURE'...'okay when then?' and then they joke and are all 'IM FREE SOMETIME IN OCTOBER FOR LIKE HALF AN HOUR' 'oh your funny but serious?' 'danno just go with the flow'
WELL I REFUSE TO GO WITH THE FLOW AND BE TOLD I AM OVER ORGANISING. HOW HARD IS IT TO PICK A DAY.
its all sorted now anyway haha. MY ORGANISATIONAL SKILLS ALWAYS PULL THROUGH MATEEEE.
i severe stress myself out over fuck all. I hate people who are so unorganised and I organise fuckin everrrrything with everyone, callin' them and all that shit. ITS STRESSFUL WORK. Especially when your on the phone to someone and your like 'Awk so do you wanna do somethin' this week hmm hmm?' and there all 'IM SKATING ALL THE TIME BUT YEA SURE'...'okay when then?' and then they joke and are all 'IM FREE SOMETIME IN OCTOBER FOR LIKE HALF AN HOUR' 'oh your funny but serious?' 'danno just go with the flow'
WELL I REFUSE TO GO WITH THE FLOW AND BE TOLD I AM OVER ORGANISING. HOW HARD IS IT TO PICK A DAY.
its all sorted now anyway haha. MY ORGANISATIONAL SKILLS ALWAYS PULL THROUGH MATEEEE.
Sunday 8 August 2010
Ramona Flowers
I'm excited to see Scott Pilgrim vs. the world. Too excited. According to Holly, I remind her of Ramona Flowers in it because she changes her hair all the time from pink and blue. Mary Elizabeth Winstead plays her, I love her in Deathproof by Quentin Tarantino.
Heres some pics of her and my old blue and pink hair. I MISS IT. I might go dark blue or lilac or violet or something methinks?
Heres some pics of her and my old blue and pink hair. I MISS IT. I might go dark blue or lilac or violet or something methinks?
OMG.
I am UNBELIEVABLY proud of this drawing! I planned to draw someone today because I'm pretty good at drawing people and it dosnt take me that long either, around 10-15 mins maybe? And their quite detailed. ONLY people though really, anything else takes me a hell of a lot longer, you wouldnt think that atall because people are generally quite hard to draw? I guess I'm a lucky one.
Anyway so I asked Chris what I should draw. He said him with a bong lmao. Well I don't have any pics of him with a bong atall so I said I would try. So I chose that pic below I took of him when he just woke up like..i dunno over a year ago? And I made up a bong in my head and drew it in along with some smoke. It shocked me because the bong and smoke go quite well with the pic I chose. I dunno, I'm just REALLY fucking proud of it beyond belief HHAHA. I'll probs give it to him if he likes it. First proper good drawing I've done of people in over a year. MAGICAL.
Anyway so I asked Chris what I should draw. He said him with a bong lmao. Well I don't have any pics of him with a bong atall so I said I would try. So I chose that pic below I took of him when he just woke up like..i dunno over a year ago? And I made up a bong in my head and drew it in along with some smoke. It shocked me because the bong and smoke go quite well with the pic I chose. I dunno, I'm just REALLY fucking proud of it beyond belief HHAHA. I'll probs give it to him if he likes it. First proper good drawing I've done of people in over a year. MAGICAL.
Drawing.
I just drew the most amazing picture, I'll post sometime later maybe. I havn't drawn in a long long time and I can;t find my sketchbook filled with all the really good drawings from last year :(
I tried to make my desktop look like a mac desktop. I don't really like mac's because their quite difficult to use and I don't know where to go on them but I like the style with the wee icons at the bottom.
I'm going to have a bath when it's darker and light candles and shit because it always looks spooky and cool like that. I've only done it once though, ages ago. I have an urge to put my laptop beside the bath and blog and take a pic of me leaning out (without seeing anything obv) and being like EYYYY BUBBLES AND STUFF ;)
I'll leave you with this <3
reminds me of Alice in Wonderland mixed with Resident Evil and a shitload of machine guns.
I tried to make my desktop look like a mac desktop. I don't really like mac's because their quite difficult to use and I don't know where to go on them but I like the style with the wee icons at the bottom.
I'm going to have a bath when it's darker and light candles and shit because it always looks spooky and cool like that. I've only done it once though, ages ago. I have an urge to put my laptop beside the bath and blog and take a pic of me leaning out (without seeing anything obv) and being like EYYYY BUBBLES AND STUFF ;)
I'll leave you with this <3
reminds me of Alice in Wonderland mixed with Resident Evil and a shitload of machine guns.
=^.^=
Right now I've decided I'm just chilling out about everything until the time comes to sort things outtt. I really love old photographs though, aren't they fucking great?!?!
Old Photo's
some of these I havn't dared to look at in so long...or dared to even post. I'm over that now. Old photo's are wonderful. I remember how I felt in every one of them.
hold on..hes biting my face? I FORGOT ALL BOUT THAT. Also mehehehe im ginger.
hold on..hes biting my face? I FORGOT ALL BOUT THAT. Also mehehehe im ginger.
I have to keep posting or I may die.
As i glance across my room and look at my Megan Fox poster I wonder to myself...should I go for a smoke?
I met some pretty interesting people yesterday. Talked to Ryan Madden and Shannie Linden for the first time. They are both wonderfully cool and Shannie is just...too cute and fashionable, its amazing. I LOVE MEETING NEW PEOPLE. Especially ones who are so nice and easy to get along with :) It brightens my day :D
Heres some more old photo's. I LOVE OLD PHOTO'S.
I met some pretty interesting people yesterday. Talked to Ryan Madden and Shannie Linden for the first time. They are both wonderfully cool and Shannie is just...too cute and fashionable, its amazing. I LOVE MEETING NEW PEOPLE. Especially ones who are so nice and easy to get along with :) It brightens my day :D
Heres some more old photo's. I LOVE OLD PHOTO'S.
:o
these are some pretty fucking old photo's from over a year ago (below)
I'm abit baffled as what I should write here..some of these photo's were during an immensely difficult time. Although me and chris were still together...I wouldn't go back their atall. Where me and him are now is probably better. ALOT BETTER. rebuilding is always better than going back. Don't ask me if it's going to work out or not and certainly do not tell me it's going to work out or not. Because ANYTHING can happen. I think I've realised that by now. YOU REALLY REALLY NEED TO WORK ON THINGS. Things can't just fall into place after such a long time. Things are always difficult. You have to rebuild relationships with people no matter how close or how 'in love' you were. Time and talking is everything the heart needs I guess to decide wether its worth it to work things out.
Though, for the first time, I'm contemplating giving up and don't think I can do it. I mentioned that below. But i guess these pictures spurred me on to go on about it. But I think thats my emotional bullshit done for now...
I don't care if you care or if you think I'm silly or stupid or wish i would shut up. I write things on here for me more than anyone.
I DEEPLY appreciate the support I have from certain people and the people I know who take the time to read what I have to say and try to understand :)
Have some love <3
I'm abit baffled as what I should write here..some of these photo's were during an immensely difficult time. Although me and chris were still together...I wouldn't go back their atall. Where me and him are now is probably better. ALOT BETTER. rebuilding is always better than going back. Don't ask me if it's going to work out or not and certainly do not tell me it's going to work out or not. Because ANYTHING can happen. I think I've realised that by now. YOU REALLY REALLY NEED TO WORK ON THINGS. Things can't just fall into place after such a long time. Things are always difficult. You have to rebuild relationships with people no matter how close or how 'in love' you were. Time and talking is everything the heart needs I guess to decide wether its worth it to work things out.
Though, for the first time, I'm contemplating giving up and don't think I can do it. I mentioned that below. But i guess these pictures spurred me on to go on about it. But I think thats my emotional bullshit done for now...
I don't care if you care or if you think I'm silly or stupid or wish i would shut up. I write things on here for me more than anyone.
I DEEPLY appreciate the support I have from certain people and the people I know who take the time to read what I have to say and try to understand :)
Have some love <3
I'm Angry
I'm not going to lie but right now I am extremely pissed off. I'm not going to be mean to people or anything but I have that feeling where your so fucking angry inside about loads of stuff and our trying to figure things out and find a way of letting it out. I guess I'll attempt to here without going into too much detail.
I'm definatly not going into too much detail on this subject. It's more of a private matter, I just want to write it down here safely without people getting in on it. I think i might give up, I don't think I can do it..you may or may not know what I'm talking about. Either way don't think too much into it, its for myself to read over more or less. I've went through far too much shit since before LAST summer that I didn't deserve, I honestly don't think I deserve alot of thing's that have happened to me...I am a good person, I try to be and really...my emotions are not a chew toy to some people. Not that anyone's actually done anything wrong here or played me around or been mean or insensitive or not tried or anything..I just kind of have been thinking and I'm so sure I can't do it and am going to leave it unless I can work out the problems very soon. It's the first time EVER I sat outside smoking and thought about it all and shook my head and said outloud 'No..I can't do it, I actually can't' I'm being entirely honest when I said that.
I've realised that everyone, no matter how awful they may seem, is going through some kind of shit. And I honestly try to see that and help so their not alone. But what's the point when some people are the type who keep their problems to themselves and don't wanna hear about yours. You never know whats going on there atall..and it makes you feel like a dick abit if they've upset you and you say something because your sick of going through shit and they say for the first time ever 'Look ive had a stressful few days' and hey, i bet they havn't or maybe they have but how can you tell and should you even care? Because they never helped with you? ISN'T THAT CONFUSING.
Alot of people have died recently, to put it bluntly. People have died by both horrible accidents or killing themselves. Alot of my friends have had to go to more than one funeral in the past week. It's not a nice thing to hear. Also theirs been alot of cases of bullying and even...a 12 year old got raped recently by 2 guys I actually SEEN at Gay Pride.
Seriously..
Is everyone really that fucked up. It scares me. It makes me breathe faster and screw up my face and get really angry but at the same time UNBELIEVABLY scared. It's unsettling to say the least. With all that and your own shitty problems you begin to wonder is their even a point in talking to people. You act happy, sad, angry, annoyed..etc. and where does it get you...to yet another stupid problem after another. And OH NO things can never really go okay because everyone has different feelings and some stupid shit will pop up that makes your heart skip abeat and everyone around you frown at you.
There never really is a right way to go about things. Were all just sort of winging it in life. Trying to make the best of it. But everyone around us effects our emotions and were all so uncontrollable and confused. And everyone gets annoyed if people don't do this or people don't do that or if they DO do something. It's all down to what everyone wants to do. I myself have learned I am always going to do what I WANT to do...wether or not I know myself it's for better or worse in the long run. Who really cares though...you only get one life, right? Well no one actually really knows. And we all want someone to care. We all want to be loved and needed. Theres nothing just quite like it, is there?
I suddenly wanted to talk more about bullying. I don't want to talk about how I have been bullied atall. I really don't. It was the most horrible time of my life EVER, well so far. If your being bullied or have been then you should know that it dosn't last forever. These are just people being complete assholes and will either regret it or are already going through some stupid shit in their life that they feel the need to beat down on you. RUMOURS spawn bullying I'd say, because then a majority of people will listen to bullshit and then have a grudge against you. But like, why? Everyones done something weird or bad or abit iffy...what is the need to judge unless it is criminally insane what they've done. I mean really, get over yourself. No ones perfect. People honestly need to stop judging and listening to lies and rumours and actually ACTING on what they've heard and being a complete dick and even getting in on it. Why would you even want to belittle someone into feeling horrible. What the fuck do you gain from it? Make yourself feel better then people will like you more? Wow, insecure much then? Their just people afterall. PEOPLE. PEOPLE. PEOPLE. PEOPLE. PEOPLE.
that is what is wrong with this fucked up world.
I'm definatly not going into too much detail on this subject. It's more of a private matter, I just want to write it down here safely without people getting in on it. I think i might give up, I don't think I can do it..you may or may not know what I'm talking about. Either way don't think too much into it, its for myself to read over more or less. I've went through far too much shit since before LAST summer that I didn't deserve, I honestly don't think I deserve alot of thing's that have happened to me...I am a good person, I try to be and really...my emotions are not a chew toy to some people. Not that anyone's actually done anything wrong here or played me around or been mean or insensitive or not tried or anything..I just kind of have been thinking and I'm so sure I can't do it and am going to leave it unless I can work out the problems very soon. It's the first time EVER I sat outside smoking and thought about it all and shook my head and said outloud 'No..I can't do it, I actually can't' I'm being entirely honest when I said that.
I've realised that everyone, no matter how awful they may seem, is going through some kind of shit. And I honestly try to see that and help so their not alone. But what's the point when some people are the type who keep their problems to themselves and don't wanna hear about yours. You never know whats going on there atall..and it makes you feel like a dick abit if they've upset you and you say something because your sick of going through shit and they say for the first time ever 'Look ive had a stressful few days' and hey, i bet they havn't or maybe they have but how can you tell and should you even care? Because they never helped with you? ISN'T THAT CONFUSING.
Alot of people have died recently, to put it bluntly. People have died by both horrible accidents or killing themselves. Alot of my friends have had to go to more than one funeral in the past week. It's not a nice thing to hear. Also theirs been alot of cases of bullying and even...a 12 year old got raped recently by 2 guys I actually SEEN at Gay Pride.
Seriously..
Is everyone really that fucked up. It scares me. It makes me breathe faster and screw up my face and get really angry but at the same time UNBELIEVABLY scared. It's unsettling to say the least. With all that and your own shitty problems you begin to wonder is their even a point in talking to people. You act happy, sad, angry, annoyed..etc. and where does it get you...to yet another stupid problem after another. And OH NO things can never really go okay because everyone has different feelings and some stupid shit will pop up that makes your heart skip abeat and everyone around you frown at you.
There never really is a right way to go about things. Were all just sort of winging it in life. Trying to make the best of it. But everyone around us effects our emotions and were all so uncontrollable and confused. And everyone gets annoyed if people don't do this or people don't do that or if they DO do something. It's all down to what everyone wants to do. I myself have learned I am always going to do what I WANT to do...wether or not I know myself it's for better or worse in the long run. Who really cares though...you only get one life, right? Well no one actually really knows. And we all want someone to care. We all want to be loved and needed. Theres nothing just quite like it, is there?
I suddenly wanted to talk more about bullying. I don't want to talk about how I have been bullied atall. I really don't. It was the most horrible time of my life EVER, well so far. If your being bullied or have been then you should know that it dosn't last forever. These are just people being complete assholes and will either regret it or are already going through some stupid shit in their life that they feel the need to beat down on you. RUMOURS spawn bullying I'd say, because then a majority of people will listen to bullshit and then have a grudge against you. But like, why? Everyones done something weird or bad or abit iffy...what is the need to judge unless it is criminally insane what they've done. I mean really, get over yourself. No ones perfect. People honestly need to stop judging and listening to lies and rumours and actually ACTING on what they've heard and being a complete dick and even getting in on it. Why would you even want to belittle someone into feeling horrible. What the fuck do you gain from it? Make yourself feel better then people will like you more? Wow, insecure much then? Their just people afterall. PEOPLE. PEOPLE. PEOPLE. PEOPLE. PEOPLE.
that is what is wrong with this fucked up world.
Saturday 7 August 2010
Chillin'
I'm blogging from Alans house on Alans laptop. WOOOT. Him and Jonesy are discussing getting a dog and Jonesy said 'Aye you can ride it to the shops nal' LOLOL debating over dogs..mm indeed.
Had a nice wee day in town with everyone. CHLOE HUME <3 loud ass bitch <3
Also had an amusing fight with Chris on the bus, I just got pretty pissed off but it turned out to be quite funny by the end of it all...I am a melt. HAD TO BE DONE THOUGH.
thats all im gonna say for now, way for a smokeeee leds. BRB
Had a nice wee day in town with everyone. CHLOE HUME <3 loud ass bitch <3
Also had an amusing fight with Chris on the bus, I just got pretty pissed off but it turned out to be quite funny by the end of it all...I am a melt. HAD TO BE DONE THOUGH.
thats all im gonna say for now, way for a smokeeee leds. BRB
Friday 6 August 2010
Young Folks
that is a snazzy wee song
I'm blogging right beside Gemma...it's odd because someone is here. HOWEVER, i thought i'd let the world know that she FARTS ALOT. It's not even a laughing matter anymore...however I farted and burped at the same time. BUT NOT LIKE HER...HERS MAKE NOISE AND SHE LAUGHS..AND ITS SCARY. mine was accident and silent due to my coughing...its not funny Gemma STOP LAUGHING BESIDE ME.
Also, I'm going to give a wee mention to Shannie A.k.a ROSS MCDONALD :D I barely know you atall but talking to you randomly on msn or facebook makes me feel like i've known you for years. IT'S SO WEEEIRDDD. I like it, I like it alottt. Your so amusing and easy to talk to..and ofcourse..your wee teacup <3 I hope this makes you happy, i think you deserve it despite not knowing you well...YET.
Also..Gemma bit her tongue and is near crying. KARMA FOR FARTING EVERYWHERE BITCH. FUCK YOU.
On a brighter note I quite enjoyed tonight chillin with Gemma and her brother Ryan. I wrote wee but considering he's taller than me and hates me callin' him wee...i wont say that againnnn mate. Gemma's now looking through my box of lube and condoms and now my tongue bar's...OH YES I BOUGHT A PACKET OF CONDOMS TONIGHT CALLED 'SKYN' CLOSEST TO WEARING NOTHING AT ALL ;)
i think ill leave you with that ;)
I'm blogging right beside Gemma...it's odd because someone is here. HOWEVER, i thought i'd let the world know that she FARTS ALOT. It's not even a laughing matter anymore...however I farted and burped at the same time. BUT NOT LIKE HER...HERS MAKE NOISE AND SHE LAUGHS..AND ITS SCARY. mine was accident and silent due to my coughing...its not funny Gemma STOP LAUGHING BESIDE ME.
Also, I'm going to give a wee mention to Shannie A.k.a ROSS MCDONALD :D I barely know you atall but talking to you randomly on msn or facebook makes me feel like i've known you for years. IT'S SO WEEEIRDDD. I like it, I like it alottt. Your so amusing and easy to talk to..and ofcourse..your wee teacup <3 I hope this makes you happy, i think you deserve it despite not knowing you well...YET.
Also..Gemma bit her tongue and is near crying. KARMA FOR FARTING EVERYWHERE BITCH. FUCK YOU.
On a brighter note I quite enjoyed tonight chillin with Gemma and her brother Ryan. I wrote wee but considering he's taller than me and hates me callin' him wee...i wont say that againnnn mate. Gemma's now looking through my box of lube and condoms and now my tongue bar's...OH YES I BOUGHT A PACKET OF CONDOMS TONIGHT CALLED 'SKYN' CLOSEST TO WEARING NOTHING AT ALL ;)
i think ill leave you with that ;)
Blogging.
I swear blogging keeps me sane. I'm quite happy I'm not writing too much emotional bullshit here, tryna keep it lighthearted so whoevers reading dosn't start weeping and getting the knife out and all...not that my life would ever be that bad that it would cause someone else to cause themselves harm. What am i actually on about?
I watched Shutter Island last night. I FUCKING LOVE LEONARDO DICAPRIO. well done man, well done. you fuck my head over in every movie and you do it with such a beautiful face....you sexy sexy man.
I really should be getting ready because Gemma's heading up now...Oh deary deary me.
lastly..I LOVE THE COLOUR LILAC. i felt the need to get that out there before i depart. tally ho.
I watched Shutter Island last night. I FUCKING LOVE LEONARDO DICAPRIO. well done man, well done. you fuck my head over in every movie and you do it with such a beautiful face....you sexy sexy man.
I really should be getting ready because Gemma's heading up now...Oh deary deary me.
lastly..I LOVE THE COLOUR LILAC. i felt the need to get that out there before i depart. tally ho.
Comic books/Comic book style movies.
Holly thinks the girl in that is like me due to the pink/blue hair. Mary Elizabeth Winstead is a sexy bitch and OMG CHRIS EVANS IS IN IT. i am an actual movie geek mate...
Thursday 5 August 2010
French songs
Parlez vous Francais, parlez vous Francais, parlez vous Francais. 'Art vs. Science - Parlez vous francais'
Such an actual good song. AND YELLE. YELLE ARE THE BEST FRENCH BAND EVER.
'do it now because you can and i think you should, do it now because you can and i told you to, do it now because you can, CAUSE YOU CAN'
I'm in a pretty sweet mood again. Probly because im taking stupid pictures on webcam and listening to music really loudly. and not depressing music. EYYYYYYYYYYYY :D
Apparently I have a fucking amazing hilarious laugh. It always changes tho. Lots of people point this out to me. The more I do a rediculous laugh the more I laugh at myself. I laugh at myself alot..I dunno wether thats a bad or a good thing.
Bad romance came on my ipod. FUCKING OVERPLAYED ADDICTIVE YET SO GOOD SONG. AHH FUCK OFF :( i nexted and got the clash :D i wish i could somehow type that noise he makes at the start of should i stay or should I go when hes all WHOOOOAHAHAOO or something to that effect.
Yesterday, I seen a dog fucking a woman on chatroulette for a split second..yea pretty weird.
'one day its fine and next its black, so if you want me off your back. well c'mon and let know, should i stay or should I go', a while ago i asked someone to choose a song for me...and they chose that one off their phone. Haha dunno why but yea THE CLASH MAN, THE CLASH <3
I could talk for actual hours. YET NO ONE ELSE EVER WANTS TO TALK. Am i actually that sad and lonely that I need to write on a blog just to feel like I'm talking to someone...LMAO NA JOKES. but yea people could talk more to me cause im sucha talky person and find life fascinating. Maybe thats why I can get over problems easier because I go and talk bout them all and get them outta my system then im like...EYYYYYYYYY GUYS *downs a drink* :D
I dont...actually...know but...my ipods just said 'connect to power'....SUEIJHTREIUTGHTIOGJDOGI DAMN YOU BASTARD I HATE YOU WHEN YOU DO THAT...
au revoir
Such an actual good song. AND YELLE. YELLE ARE THE BEST FRENCH BAND EVER.
'do it now because you can and i think you should, do it now because you can and i told you to, do it now because you can, CAUSE YOU CAN'
I'm in a pretty sweet mood again. Probly because im taking stupid pictures on webcam and listening to music really loudly. and not depressing music. EYYYYYYYYYYYY :D
Apparently I have a fucking amazing hilarious laugh. It always changes tho. Lots of people point this out to me. The more I do a rediculous laugh the more I laugh at myself. I laugh at myself alot..I dunno wether thats a bad or a good thing.
Bad romance came on my ipod. FUCKING OVERPLAYED ADDICTIVE YET SO GOOD SONG. AHH FUCK OFF :( i nexted and got the clash :D i wish i could somehow type that noise he makes at the start of should i stay or should I go when hes all WHOOOOAHAHAOO or something to that effect.
Yesterday, I seen a dog fucking a woman on chatroulette for a split second..yea pretty weird.
'one day its fine and next its black, so if you want me off your back. well c'mon and let know, should i stay or should I go', a while ago i asked someone to choose a song for me...and they chose that one off their phone. Haha dunno why but yea THE CLASH MAN, THE CLASH <3
I could talk for actual hours. YET NO ONE ELSE EVER WANTS TO TALK. Am i actually that sad and lonely that I need to write on a blog just to feel like I'm talking to someone...LMAO NA JOKES. but yea people could talk more to me cause im sucha talky person and find life fascinating. Maybe thats why I can get over problems easier because I go and talk bout them all and get them outta my system then im like...EYYYYYYYYY GUYS *downs a drink* :D
I dont...actually...know but...my ipods just said 'connect to power'....SUEIJHTREIUTGHTIOGJDOGI DAMN YOU BASTARD I HATE YOU WHEN YOU DO THAT...
au revoir
Skateboarding.
I adore the film logs of dogtown. I think skateboarding is one sexy ass sport. I actually wish I could do it haha. Weirdly enough when I was wee I used to go on my cousins skateboard and at my friends house...I was pretty badass for a kid. Near killed myself on a skateboard once...almost flew into a main road and didn't know how to stop...except for the 'jumping' technique. Strange that near all my friends are skateboarders.
Much better than Spides tho..in my opinion. Well screw that, it all depends on personality really, not the style.
I'm feeling an intense mood coming on.
Much better than Spides tho..in my opinion. Well screw that, it all depends on personality really, not the style.
I'm feeling an intense mood coming on.
1 reason not to be happy.
Paranoia
It is actually the one thing I hate because it gives me an anxious feeling all the time.
Is it weird that sometimes I look at someone who hasn't done anything on me and I have a pure hate for them and then shortly after they do something to properly piss me off? It's like i can sometimes tell when bad shit is going to go down. Actually, I don't let on to people but I properly have bad feelings when bad stuff is going to happen...and it usually does and then I'm not altogether that upset, just more shocked.
It is actually the one thing I hate because it gives me an anxious feeling all the time.
Is it weird that sometimes I look at someone who hasn't done anything on me and I have a pure hate for them and then shortly after they do something to properly piss me off? It's like i can sometimes tell when bad shit is going to go down. Actually, I don't let on to people but I properly have bad feelings when bad stuff is going to happen...and it usually does and then I'm not altogether that upset, just more shocked.
Wednesday 4 August 2010
Tiredness
It makes you feel so much more at peace..its nice to be sleepy. I feel so like drowsy sleepy and its making me feel so much more comfortable.
I'm pretty happy. Few things i needa sort out in my head. But overall, pretty happy.
Tryna keep things steady and level.
I'm pretty happy. Few things i needa sort out in my head. But overall, pretty happy.
Tryna keep things steady and level.
Cigarettes
Dirty scummy cigarettes. But yes, they make me quite happy when i want them.
I have one wee cigarette left. NO WAY BITCH. NO WAY. now the depression has hit me...na just kidding.
Do you ever think anyones like..slit their wrists...because they ran out of fegs.
I WISH EVERYONE HAD A BLOGSPOT. IT WOULD BE LIKE CLIMBING INTO WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU WANTEDS MIND!?!
I have one wee cigarette left. NO WAY BITCH. NO WAY. now the depression has hit me...na just kidding.
Do you ever think anyones like..slit their wrists...because they ran out of fegs.
I WISH EVERYONE HAD A BLOGSPOT. IT WOULD BE LIKE CLIMBING INTO WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU WANTEDS MIND!?!
Porn
To the bitches that go 'Omg ew porn gross omg wtf as if i watch that' YOU ACTUAL LYING BASTARDS..or perhaps you really are stuck up prudes. Go on redtube mate, and have abit of fun. IT IS NATURAL. I have had many discussions with guys and when I say i watch porn they are instantly like 'Omg you are fucking cool, most girls say they don't' and they seem to respect you abit more for it haha and think your fun..I said it to who I was on the phone to last night..I can't remember how we got on the topic and he said 'Well fuck...that turned me on' AHAHAHA good times...Okay I guess I'll move on from this topic before yous think Im a sick dirty bastard..
well truth is I am. GTF.
I am sensationally happy today. I'm just lying in bed, blogging away. But I'm all happy and stuff. I'm not even listening to music and I only have one cigarette left. BUT I'M HAPPY MATE. I'm not letting any shit get me down whatsoever, I don't care how fucked up things get, I am determined to stay happy as a bitch on speed.
Wow, my mind instantly turned to drugs. They still fascinate me but I always border from being a complete druggie to not liking them atall. I go from one extreme to the other, even with my moods. I remember the days spent hiding bags and coming up with plans incase anyone caught us. I remember being ecstatically happy and hugging people, telling them I loved them. I remember planning random adventures and even going on random adventures. I remember getting late lifts home with people wiped off my face, the music practically making me orgasm, rolling into my house and not stopping dancing for an hour. I remember the last ep of skins and going so close to the tv with my eyes wide as fuck, completely spaced. It was intense. I remember racking a line on the floor of a toilet on my phone. I remember taking keys outside a club and people near enough seeing me doing it. I remember bits of my nose coming out, bits of sticky red bloody skin. I remember the aching feeling all over. I remember the horrible cumdowms where I'd want to die. I remember sitting for a full day hating my life and not knowing what to do with myself. I remember my sore lips and aching jaws. I remember too much of that shit, I like them memories, good or bad.......I don't want any more memories though. That's final. So you keep your bags of coke or meph or whatever the fuck you like to sniff and you sniff it and you say its great and you do what you gotta do and you make your life out to be great as much as you want to people...but no mate, you can't lie to me. I know the confusing thoughts that go through your head, I know how your mind changes constantly. I just know.
well truth is I am. GTF.
I am sensationally happy today. I'm just lying in bed, blogging away. But I'm all happy and stuff. I'm not even listening to music and I only have one cigarette left. BUT I'M HAPPY MATE. I'm not letting any shit get me down whatsoever, I don't care how fucked up things get, I am determined to stay happy as a bitch on speed.
Wow, my mind instantly turned to drugs. They still fascinate me but I always border from being a complete druggie to not liking them atall. I go from one extreme to the other, even with my moods. I remember the days spent hiding bags and coming up with plans incase anyone caught us. I remember being ecstatically happy and hugging people, telling them I loved them. I remember planning random adventures and even going on random adventures. I remember getting late lifts home with people wiped off my face, the music practically making me orgasm, rolling into my house and not stopping dancing for an hour. I remember the last ep of skins and going so close to the tv with my eyes wide as fuck, completely spaced. It was intense. I remember racking a line on the floor of a toilet on my phone. I remember taking keys outside a club and people near enough seeing me doing it. I remember bits of my nose coming out, bits of sticky red bloody skin. I remember the aching feeling all over. I remember the horrible cumdowms where I'd want to die. I remember sitting for a full day hating my life and not knowing what to do with myself. I remember my sore lips and aching jaws. I remember too much of that shit, I like them memories, good or bad.......I don't want any more memories though. That's final. So you keep your bags of coke or meph or whatever the fuck you like to sniff and you sniff it and you say its great and you do what you gotta do and you make your life out to be great as much as you want to people...but no mate, you can't lie to me. I know the confusing thoughts that go through your head, I know how your mind changes constantly. I just know.
How people act
People fascinate me. They can truly make you happy by the things they do and say...I mean honestly..some stuff that you watch or see can really move you and think 'fuck me i love life and i love people'. Some people are truly hilarious..
on a less serious note..
am i seriously getting some fucker from my old school asking me for casual sex and If Im bi?
pleasantly confused by that. Dunno wether that should add to my 'i love people' or 'i hate people' moments.
RYAN MORRIS. you are excellent. no one even knows you and they havn't even a clue the shit i go on about to you, because were both emotional bastards. I am pretty close to you despite never seeing you, except like..once. HAHA but yea you know too much shit about me, its rediculous and your definatly the best person for deep outrageous talks. I count you amongst my greatest friends...now go listen to some The Cure and tell me something deep and interesting :o
on a less serious note..
am i seriously getting some fucker from my old school asking me for casual sex and If Im bi?
pleasantly confused by that. Dunno wether that should add to my 'i love people' or 'i hate people' moments.
RYAN MORRIS. you are excellent. no one even knows you and they havn't even a clue the shit i go on about to you, because were both emotional bastards. I am pretty close to you despite never seeing you, except like..once. HAHA but yea you know too much shit about me, its rediculous and your definatly the best person for deep outrageous talks. I count you amongst my greatest friends...now go listen to some The Cure and tell me something deep and interesting :o
Laughing with friends I miss
I absolutely love so many people at the minute and its so weird haha. So many people have been too good to me. I've mentioned random shout outs to too many people on this blog including a huge one for holly and all her gayness. Hmm but I havn't mentioned my absolute amazingggg baby Jake Hunter or my wee angry bunny Gemma Clarke.
I fucking love you Jake, SO MUCH. like its unreal. We've been through so much shit, I've known you just as long as I was going out with Chris even. JESUS. Lmao remember you humping me randomly and running to the bathroom. I was just lying their like...'what the fuck' Man, I've always loved you. ALWAYS. I could never fall out with you properly. Sometimes I doubt wether I can trust you sometimes incase you fuck off and be mean about me but I know without a doubt you are 100% my actual wee soulmate or some shit. It is never a dull day with you. Their is not enough words right now for me to describe the closeness of us. You never actually fail to make me happy. I LOVE YOU.
And Gemma you wee shit ( I say that with as much love as possible) You are such a wee angry bunny..or angry penguin if you'd rather. Never have I laughed so much at someone because their so funny then been so like ':|' at your anger. You have such a funny way of being angry your just like quiet...and I try and force you to talk. Its funnier in real life because then I resort to drawing wee penguin pictures that make you piss yourself laughing. THATS RIGHT I MAKE YOU LAUGH ALOT. But man i laugh at the stuff you come off with all the time. I love you like properly. You've been their for me so much its been unreal and sometimes I want to kill you because you don't talk and I can't tell if your annoyed or something. But Honestly, your amazing. We've had so many good times drinking tea and just...just chillin' yenoe ;) sitting up til like 6 in the morning singing 'I believe in miracles' or 'Express yourself', slabbering bout certain ppl on end..I think you overuse the term 'sucha wee dick', its all i can imagine you saying in my head right now...you've brought a tear to my eye many times for the amount of love i express for you, you are my actual sister from another mister <3
I'll probably write more things like this for loads of different people but they were on my mind atm, aswell as Tyler who I wrote about before...That's who i was talking about who was there for me.
:) happyyy
I fucking love you Jake, SO MUCH. like its unreal. We've been through so much shit, I've known you just as long as I was going out with Chris even. JESUS. Lmao remember you humping me randomly and running to the bathroom. I was just lying their like...'what the fuck' Man, I've always loved you. ALWAYS. I could never fall out with you properly. Sometimes I doubt wether I can trust you sometimes incase you fuck off and be mean about me but I know without a doubt you are 100% my actual wee soulmate or some shit. It is never a dull day with you. Their is not enough words right now for me to describe the closeness of us. You never actually fail to make me happy. I LOVE YOU.
And Gemma you wee shit ( I say that with as much love as possible) You are such a wee angry bunny..or angry penguin if you'd rather. Never have I laughed so much at someone because their so funny then been so like ':|' at your anger. You have such a funny way of being angry your just like quiet...and I try and force you to talk. Its funnier in real life because then I resort to drawing wee penguin pictures that make you piss yourself laughing. THATS RIGHT I MAKE YOU LAUGH ALOT. But man i laugh at the stuff you come off with all the time. I love you like properly. You've been their for me so much its been unreal and sometimes I want to kill you because you don't talk and I can't tell if your annoyed or something. But Honestly, your amazing. We've had so many good times drinking tea and just...just chillin' yenoe ;) sitting up til like 6 in the morning singing 'I believe in miracles' or 'Express yourself', slabbering bout certain ppl on end..I think you overuse the term 'sucha wee dick', its all i can imagine you saying in my head right now...you've brought a tear to my eye many times for the amount of love i express for you, you are my actual sister from another mister <3
I'll probably write more things like this for loads of different people but they were on my mind atm, aswell as Tyler who I wrote about before...That's who i was talking about who was there for me.
:) happyyy
People who were just there.
Someone on my fb that I don't see enough left me a comment saying they missed me. And alot of memories from last year came flooding back. A particular one of me crying in the corner in someones room and he was just there, watching, confused, trying to cheer me up. He was always there and he didn't care what anyone else said. He was no doubt about it a complete mad bastard and I don't think I ever gave him enough credit for the amount of time he was willing to come and spend with a miserable shit like me. I think i became abit hardened and began to care less what I said about people towards the end...i feel as though I'm constantly learning something new every now and then..and I'm definatly progressing with it.
'Omg do you think that will stop her'
I keep thinking about that and yes you dumb bitch, i think it will. Not like you were there for me atall, even though before i left for england i said i was sorry i couldn't come see you (rediculous I was saying sorry to you for not seeing you ISNT IT). You were unbelievably sympathetic NA I THINK NOT. COMPLETE SARCASM. haha its funny because see your wee best friend, he slabbers non stop behind your back to people in my school still because they told me. I don't like him either because he's slabbered behind everyones back, including mine, even though i've been nothing but nice. And i've heard so much about you but I've never went around saying shit. I don't get involved in peoples shit. Fair enough i've let a few secrets slip but I've always said sorry for them. Where do you get off pretending you know me even though i havn't seen you in over a year? HOLD UP HOLD UP, arnt you the one running to me saying you think your pregnant with a random guy's baby every fucking week? Chyeaaa cause I'm so thick and don't know your slabbering about me and my situations and probably telling the whole fucking world. Most people never liked you, I'd be surprised if their still not all slabbering behind your back. I've never said a bad word about you til now, and hey, I'm still not. I'm just blogging my own thoughts afterall. But mate, I know i've fucked up but I try not to judge other people, just you get your head out of your ass before you end up taking the biggest shit on yourself.
'Omg do you think that will stop her'
I keep thinking about that and yes you dumb bitch, i think it will. Not like you were there for me atall, even though before i left for england i said i was sorry i couldn't come see you (rediculous I was saying sorry to you for not seeing you ISNT IT). You were unbelievably sympathetic NA I THINK NOT. COMPLETE SARCASM. haha its funny because see your wee best friend, he slabbers non stop behind your back to people in my school still because they told me. I don't like him either because he's slabbered behind everyones back, including mine, even though i've been nothing but nice. And i've heard so much about you but I've never went around saying shit. I don't get involved in peoples shit. Fair enough i've let a few secrets slip but I've always said sorry for them. Where do you get off pretending you know me even though i havn't seen you in over a year? HOLD UP HOLD UP, arnt you the one running to me saying you think your pregnant with a random guy's baby every fucking week? Chyeaaa cause I'm so thick and don't know your slabbering about me and my situations and probably telling the whole fucking world. Most people never liked you, I'd be surprised if their still not all slabbering behind your back. I've never said a bad word about you til now, and hey, I'm still not. I'm just blogging my own thoughts afterall. But mate, I know i've fucked up but I try not to judge other people, just you get your head out of your ass before you end up taking the biggest shit on yourself.
Lazy, sunny mornings.
I've woken up to see sun pouring in my window. Isn't that nice?! well i think it is..though i do prefer the rain. Though i sat in that last night to make myself better. The sound of the rain makes me unbelievably ecstatic. Yes, think I'm weird all you want, caring is beyond me right now.
:)
Went to see inception but I've already seen it and the tickets were sold out. POO. So me and Holly ended up playing house of dead in an arcade for about an hour. MY GOD WAS IT GOOD. I absolutely love house of dead. Last time i played that was with Jordan Shaw in the odyssey arcade. We were pretty flatout then but I died :( But s'all good because me and Holly were RIPPIN' last night on that shit. I wish I had the actual arcade game sitting in my house. Those guns are just...so sexy.
Well after that we went to McDonalds where a pretty sexy lady friend of mine who works there gave me a free McFlurry. OH THAT BEAUTIFUL WEE BITCH. She has a sense of fun about her like no one else I know has, I don't think she could ever be annoyed at me, were always just too happy. It's like were in love. I think we are. LOL im talking shit now but yes I love her.
Why did we end up sitting outside the cinema again bored as fuck?
Who knows but good job we did mate as we ran into Daryl whom I never see enough despite knowing him for all my life, hanging out with him way too much and practically living in his house and being adopted by his mother :) For some random reason we ended up in his car following his friend's car to Carrick where they sat in the harbour and ate their McDonalds whilst me and Holly smoked and I became dangerously hyper. By the time he took us home we were talking complete shit and sounded drunk...we even felt drunk as we wandered up my lane at 12 in the night in the dark. IT WAS EXHILERATING.
I had a conversation on the phone for about 2-3 hours in the very early hours of the morning. He'd phoned me first but I phoned him back because I was abit upset. By the end of it though we were talking complete bullshit but yea, that was a really nice phonecall. It made me feel like it was 2 years ago and I was falling in love again. HAHA i pissed myself after I wrote that. Ahh deary me.
I'm starting to use this like twitter..
:)
Went to see inception but I've already seen it and the tickets were sold out. POO. So me and Holly ended up playing house of dead in an arcade for about an hour. MY GOD WAS IT GOOD. I absolutely love house of dead. Last time i played that was with Jordan Shaw in the odyssey arcade. We were pretty flatout then but I died :( But s'all good because me and Holly were RIPPIN' last night on that shit. I wish I had the actual arcade game sitting in my house. Those guns are just...so sexy.
Well after that we went to McDonalds where a pretty sexy lady friend of mine who works there gave me a free McFlurry. OH THAT BEAUTIFUL WEE BITCH. She has a sense of fun about her like no one else I know has, I don't think she could ever be annoyed at me, were always just too happy. It's like were in love. I think we are. LOL im talking shit now but yes I love her.
Why did we end up sitting outside the cinema again bored as fuck?
Who knows but good job we did mate as we ran into Daryl whom I never see enough despite knowing him for all my life, hanging out with him way too much and practically living in his house and being adopted by his mother :) For some random reason we ended up in his car following his friend's car to Carrick where they sat in the harbour and ate their McDonalds whilst me and Holly smoked and I became dangerously hyper. By the time he took us home we were talking complete shit and sounded drunk...we even felt drunk as we wandered up my lane at 12 in the night in the dark. IT WAS EXHILERATING.
I had a conversation on the phone for about 2-3 hours in the very early hours of the morning. He'd phoned me first but I phoned him back because I was abit upset. By the end of it though we were talking complete bullshit but yea, that was a really nice phonecall. It made me feel like it was 2 years ago and I was falling in love again. HAHA i pissed myself after I wrote that. Ahh deary me.
I'm starting to use this like twitter..
because
nothing in this blog is aimed at anyone in a harmful/nasty way, infact virtually nothing in this is even aimed at anyone. I use this to express thoughts and feelings at the time and tbh I'm genuinly scared to even do that now. I just wanted to use this to have a wee part of myself to look back on and laugh at the stupid stuff going on in my life then. I don't really care who's reading this either because for a start I never sent the link of this around to anyone atall so If your reading, you've most likely got it off someone else and I havn't intended in you reading it. So if you get the feeling somethings about you and you get upset, chances are its really not, and on your own head beit, never asked you to come on. Not even gonna be up myself or anything but this is my own wee personal place to write whatever the fuck I want so I'd rather not have people assuming shit and holding things against me, its only words after all. Be lighthearted about it. Im a 17 year old girl. What's a bunch of emotional words gonna do to you.
Fuck it.
People need to seriously chill out and realise who and whats important to them. I don't care if your reading but you've been one of my closest friends for a while now and you've gotten genuinly upset over things and are bringing up silly stuff in the past to try and hold against me..and I'm sorry but it is rediculous. You are literally getting so annoyed over things that are meaningless and wern't meant to even cause harm. If I havn't told you absolutely everything or done everything you wanted or said a white lie and not came out cause I'm 'Tired', It's not going to be the end of the world, well it shouldn't be anyway, not when I'm your closest friend. I'm not having a go, I just needed to express this to myself so understand that. I've looked through your point of view, I'd appreciate it if you looked through mine as I'm only young and the things your upset over..their not worth being upset over atall. If I'm meant to be incredibly close you shoulda just laughed at the stupid shit that went on on saturday when we were all drunk. You shoulda just said you were annoyed bout stuff and it woulda been sorted in a mature way. You took the nasty route and you may be hurt but I can guarantee you its hurt me more. I don't want to talk to anyone else about this..I'd rather it be left. I have my own problems at the minute and weirdly enough..not to do with a certain boy atall so he's been left out of it..I'm more worried bout my own health and my own well being at the minute considering past events most people know about and havn't been nice about either. So tbh I think i need some time away because I'm being caused unnecassary stress at a turning point in my life. I'm trying to sort things out so that I'll be okay. From here on out I've stopped caring, I'm over whatever fights have started and I've already said sorry BUT I've only said sorry because silly things that meant no harm and were just childish have upset you when they shouldn't have (only thing i take seriously is telling a secret but i already told you the next day BACK THEN that i did and said sorry so i don't feel bad about that) Try and realise that because I'm done. I'm too old for slabbering and being vicious. It's honestly not my thing. Apart from that my life has actually been okay! Ill blog last night and the good side of it in my next post :)
Goodbye.
P.S that was just my own thoughts in my head that i wanted(needed) to get out to feel better. Attempting to hold it against me is not gonna work because it's a blog for christ sake, I'm not holding a gun to anyone's head.
Fuck it.
People need to seriously chill out and realise who and whats important to them. I don't care if your reading but you've been one of my closest friends for a while now and you've gotten genuinly upset over things and are bringing up silly stuff in the past to try and hold against me..and I'm sorry but it is rediculous. You are literally getting so annoyed over things that are meaningless and wern't meant to even cause harm. If I havn't told you absolutely everything or done everything you wanted or said a white lie and not came out cause I'm 'Tired', It's not going to be the end of the world, well it shouldn't be anyway, not when I'm your closest friend. I'm not having a go, I just needed to express this to myself so understand that. I've looked through your point of view, I'd appreciate it if you looked through mine as I'm only young and the things your upset over..their not worth being upset over atall. If I'm meant to be incredibly close you shoulda just laughed at the stupid shit that went on on saturday when we were all drunk. You shoulda just said you were annoyed bout stuff and it woulda been sorted in a mature way. You took the nasty route and you may be hurt but I can guarantee you its hurt me more. I don't want to talk to anyone else about this..I'd rather it be left. I have my own problems at the minute and weirdly enough..not to do with a certain boy atall so he's been left out of it..I'm more worried bout my own health and my own well being at the minute considering past events most people know about and havn't been nice about either. So tbh I think i need some time away because I'm being caused unnecassary stress at a turning point in my life. I'm trying to sort things out so that I'll be okay. From here on out I've stopped caring, I'm over whatever fights have started and I've already said sorry BUT I've only said sorry because silly things that meant no harm and were just childish have upset you when they shouldn't have (only thing i take seriously is telling a secret but i already told you the next day BACK THEN that i did and said sorry so i don't feel bad about that) Try and realise that because I'm done. I'm too old for slabbering and being vicious. It's honestly not my thing. Apart from that my life has actually been okay! Ill blog last night and the good side of it in my next post :)
Goodbye.
P.S that was just my own thoughts in my head that i wanted(needed) to get out to feel better. Attempting to hold it against me is not gonna work because it's a blog for christ sake, I'm not holding a gun to anyone's head.
Tuesday 3 August 2010
HU DAT. HU DAT BITCH?
this is one of my best friends who i sadly have not seen enough and have neglected...HERES SOME GAY PICS OF THE BASTARD TO PROVE MY LOVEEE <3
Monday 2 August 2010
Tea
fuck me like. its not just him. its me aswell. im so god damn angry cause of everything and he's willing to forget all of that and fucking try and i'm such a bitch about it and moan. if i want him why the fuck don't i just try harder and stop being a whiny little bitch. you know yous both love each other so be the person he loves you twat and youll be happy cause then he'll be happy. jesus
Hilarious pictures
I've only recently started blogging like fuck on this and I'm really loving it so I started posting pics. Albeit not the most attractive pictures but still hilarious memoriesss. As you have probably gathered, I'm the wee one with the red hair.
My mum let me smoke in her car today with the window down, felt like a right millie but it was all good.
I'm getting really annoyed with one of my bestest friend's who persists on barely talking to me in both real life and msn but insists nothing is wrong. I can't be assed making an effort anymore tbh
My mum let me smoke in her car today with the window down, felt like a right millie but it was all good.
I'm getting really annoyed with one of my bestest friend's who persists on barely talking to me in both real life and msn but insists nothing is wrong. I can't be assed making an effort anymore tbh
The Sky
The sky may not be a good enough reason to be happy but if you just go outside and lie down and look at it..ESPECIALLY at night and look at either the clouds or stars..you feel abit more content with yourself and the world.
Im happy today, though i feel like shit because I need a shower and stuff but im genuinly happy. Secretly, im praying to God things don't start to fuck up. I need to stop being so paranoid and getting annoyed easily. Everyone says im so laid back and positive but when it comes to certain things I get so angry and can't get it out of my head and for once i think someone needs to tell me to 'Chill the fuck out' Instead of me being the one saying it to them.
Well theres no one here to tell me to chill out so I'll say it to myself 'CHILL OUT, THINGS WILL WORK OUT JUST GIVE IT TIME AND GO WITH THE FLOW AND HAVE FUN'
hmm that felt better. abit better.
i look like complete shit in this picture. partly because im pissed, and also because I'm doing some pretty unattractive thing with my lips. May i just point out, I don't know who 3/4 of the people are in this but we were all pretty spangled in a bar so i decided to wap out my nikon :)
Im happy today, though i feel like shit because I need a shower and stuff but im genuinly happy. Secretly, im praying to God things don't start to fuck up. I need to stop being so paranoid and getting annoyed easily. Everyone says im so laid back and positive but when it comes to certain things I get so angry and can't get it out of my head and for once i think someone needs to tell me to 'Chill the fuck out' Instead of me being the one saying it to them.
Well theres no one here to tell me to chill out so I'll say it to myself 'CHILL OUT, THINGS WILL WORK OUT JUST GIVE IT TIME AND GO WITH THE FLOW AND HAVE FUN'
hmm that felt better. abit better.
i look like complete shit in this picture. partly because im pissed, and also because I'm doing some pretty unattractive thing with my lips. May i just point out, I don't know who 3/4 of the people are in this but we were all pretty spangled in a bar so i decided to wap out my nikon :)
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